The Church and Same-Sex Attraction Vol. 1

By Raul Rivera

In churches all across America, the number of pastors dealing with people bound by same-sex attraction has grown exponentially.  Many of the pastors I have spoken with have confessed they feel ill equipped to handle with it.  How do you confront the behavior in a way that clearly speaks a message of love and grace? 

This phenomenon is not really new.  It has existed for many centuries.  In fact, it was a prominent issue of the early church.  Historians tell us that the ancient world of the Greeks and Romans did not have a word for homosexual, which explains why Paul addressed it directly in Romans 1:26 and 27 as unnatural sexual relations with dire consequences. 

When you think of same-sex attraction it appears to be a simple issue.  Yet when you detail how it impacts the church, it becomes increasingly complex.  Have you taken time to ask yourself the following questions?

1.     How do you help someone who wants to overcome? 

2.     What if they want to overcome, but keep falling? 

3.     What if you perceive that their efforts are insincere?

4.     What about those that prey upon the vulnerable, repent and then do it again?

5.     What if someone sues the church claiming they were preyed upon? 

6.     What if a staff member confesses that he/she has struggled with same-sex attractions? 

7.     What if you are in a state that prohibits hiring or firing based on sexual orientation?

8.     Are there legal ramifications you could prepare for?

We are His church and we are called to bring His message of hope to a lost and dying world.  That message is as much for those in the same-sex attraction trap as it is for those who are lost in a multitude of any other type of sin.  Let me give you three things to consider that may help you.

1. Get educated:  How much do you know about same-sex attraction?  What are its causes?  Why are more people today than before claiming such attractions?  An integral part of being a pastor is to understand why people fall into the traps of sin, for we are not unaware the devil's schemes (2 Cor. 2:11).  Purchase books that will teach a biblical approach to dealing with same-sex attraction and how it takes roots in people's lives.  Learn how to counsel people that struggle with this issue. 
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2. Articulate your belief:  Are you able to clearly articulate your church's position and doctrine concerning sexual sin, which includes orientation?  While same-sex attraction is a growing concern in church today, we all know that if you put every type of illicit sexual behavior into one category, it has been and will continue to be the biggest problem in the church today.  A day will come, if not already, where your belief will be challenged.  A clear and lucid explanation of your church's stance will go a long way.  Many pastors that I talk to today have a stance but cannot clearly articulate it because they probably have not needed to do so.  That day is coming.
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3. Ask for God's heart in this matter:  How does God feel about people who have same-sex attractions?  No amount of knowledge or articulation will help you love someone outside of seeing them though the filter of our loving Father in heaven.  By asking the Lord to reveal His heart, you will be able to lovingly help people gain the strength they need to overcome this life controlling issue, without condoning the behavior.
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4. Strengthen up your legal structure:  In Florida, where my wife and I pastored our church, it was common to hear news of a coming hurricane.  As always, we would prepare our homes by taking the necessary measures to secure the property.  Same-sex attraction is a storm that when left to its own devices leads to a slew of other issues such as same-sex marriage, sexual orientation hiring and firing, and other legal ramifications.  Many pastors have not done anything to strengthen their church's legal front.  It is here where same-sex marriage will affect your ministry the most.

What does it mean to strengthen my legal structure?

Every church has a structure through which it operates.  Your structure is either going to help you succeed or bring you many setbacks.  Everything composes your legal structure, from your organizational paperwork such as incorporation, bylaws, and 501(c)(3) application, to your policies.  What is in those documents? 

In Part two, I will share with you what you can do to prepare your church for the legal ramifications that this issue promises to bring.  Getting ready is crucial to your church's future.

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